Monday, April 27, 2015

analysis of evil

I want a story about a villain.

This has, of course, been done before. But whenever it is done, the villain becomes the protagonist. He gets to be the good guy, gets to tell his side of the story, because in his eyes he is the good guy.

What I want is a bad guy -- a bad guy who knows his role. Not some lost soul who through choice or circumstance, through selfishness or greed or envy or any other deadly sin, ends up harming others. What I want is malice. Malice is not listed in biblical sins to avoid because no one seems to ever, when explaining what led to their mistakes, claim they wanted to be cruel.

I want cruelty. I want someone to tell the story of who they are and what they did while knowing the audience will fall in love with every other character while wanting the narrator's head on a stick.

And for that narrator to tell the story anyway.

It doesn't happen like that. Because no one sympathizes with malice, no one understands it or relates to it because no one -- absolutely no one -- considers themselves a villain. No one considers themselves evil or cruel. Selfish, maybe. Greedy, maybe. But these are only flaws, and you are not your flaws.

No one can wake up every morning understanding fully that the heart within their chest is stone through and through. They have to put their feet on the ground. They have to put on pants. They have to put food in their mouth.

How can anyone do this with their mistakes being those of cruelty? Selfishness is human. Rage is human. Revenge is human. But malice? Wanting to injure others purely for injury's sake? No, this is for the monsters under the bed. The monsters can't tell the story because no one can believe it in their hearts when they hear it.

No matter how much you hate yourself, you cannot truly believe who you are is evil.

You have to put pants on in the morning.

You have to put your head on a pillow at night.

And in the meantime all the other characters, all those whose hearts are brave and kind and selfless and honest and loving and human, are suffering and crying and dying because of you. Where are your pants now?

I don't think anyone can survive being the villain, not for the whole story. Accepting their role only leads to trying to change it, trying to find the ever-present goodness at the center of every human heart. You don't have to believe in God. You don't have to believe in the Universe. But you have to believe in that goodness. There is no way to survive your life without that belief.

Is it true? Of course it is. There is no pure good, and there is no pure bad, not in human terms.

But we wouldn't be able to survive a different answer.

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