From a family who doesn't celebrate birthdays or tack things onto the fridge, Nick Daniel is a pretty noticeable thing.
Nick Daniel is an insurance agent or something else boring I don't understand. He comes to our house sometimes and we feed him and listen to him talk about retirement plans and investments and show us graphs and stuff and then we ask him about his girlfriend and give him tips on his life.
Every time one of the kids has a birthday, we are reminded of it by getting a Nick Daniel magnet in the mail. I like making a big deal out of it - like, WOW, I got a magnet with Nick Daniel's face on it! What a day to be alive! And I stick it right on the fridge where everyone can see, as if he's a high test score or a finger painting or a family photograph.
Then, one day, something happened.
This happened.
Nick Daniel is an insurance agent or something else boring I don't understand. He comes to our house sometimes and we feed him and listen to him talk about retirement plans and investments and show us graphs and stuff and then we ask him about his girlfriend and give him tips on his life.
Every time one of the kids has a birthday, we are reminded of it by getting a Nick Daniel magnet in the mail. I like making a big deal out of it - like, WOW, I got a magnet with Nick Daniel's face on it! What a day to be alive! And I stick it right on the fridge where everyone can see, as if he's a high test score or a finger painting or a family photograph.
Then, one day, something happened.
This happened.
I think I might have to explain that this is not the first time.
My household has a strange habit of finding faces scrawled out of photographs completely inconspicuously. Once one is discovered, we ask every single member of the family - (there are seven) - if they know who the culprit was. And, every single time, no one confesses.
And it'll happen again. A beautiful family photograph with a hole scrawled out of it with a car key, right on someone's face. We decide to blame it on the baby. We decide to stop asking questions.
We have a pretty decent idea about where it is coming from. But when you know someone is scribbling out faces, you don't exactly want to be the one accusing them of scribbling out faces. You know?
But this - this was a travesty. Nick Daniel did nothing to anyone except teach us about savings. He is all we have on our fridge.
And birthdays only happen once a year.
... Coincidentally, we've got ourselves an awful lot of birthdays to account for.
"I'm back."
When is ur birth day?
ReplyDeleteMarch
Delete