A Tribute to Egg Nog

Hey!
Does anybody else remember EGG NOG?!
It's like magic in a cup! Or carton, or bottle or whatever.

It's like the most magical thing on the planet!!
And it's only available SOMETIMES! I think, like, when it's snowy outside? Because I'm really observant.

I remember one year my mom froze a whole gallon of the stuff in our freezer and we took it out in June and drank it all.

I remember it, because there was egg nog.

I remember it, because...egg nog.

Egg nog.
Egg nog.
Egg nog.

You wanna get fat?

Egg nog.

You want to put an end to veganism?

Egg nog.

You want me to love you?

EGG NOG.

There is absolutely nothing like it. Except egg nog ice cream... o.o

I think I should open a store and sell nothing but egg nog and egg nog flavored food stuffs and egg nog T shirts and socks and merchandise. And you know what it would be called?

Egg Nog.




...

JUST KIDDING. It would be called Folding Chairs. Because then people would walk in looking for folding chairs and see all this egg nog and be all "Excuse me, do you have any...um...folding chairs?" And I would look at them with an egg nog mustache - no, an egg nog beard - around my mouth and look at them like they are the stupidest person who has ever stepped foot on the planet, and then say, "...I think you mean next door."
Then they would walk over next door, and we would watch them from the windows as they look up all confused at the sign next door thats says 'Egg Nog'.


Those sillies, don't they know they ALWAYS sell folding chairs at Egg Nog? There are some STUPID PEOPLE in this country!

I wonder if they have caffeine in egg nog...or crack.

Because that would explain a lot.

INCOHERENT YELLING!!! D:<